Stewart Loves... Stewart?

First, an apology for not posting for a bit. I was busy bowing to the Academic Gods. For the record, probability is "teh sux0rz." To make it up to all y'all, I'm extending an invitation to my readers. July 22 is Cruel Hazel's birthday. To celebrate, the posse and I will be hitting our yearly outing, the ARTSCAPE festival in downtown Baltimore. It's a kickass festival that runs Friday through Sunday in downtown B-more in Mt Royal. There's art exhibits, vendors, food, shows, demonstrations, people, a short-film marathon by the Maryland Film Festival, the whole shebang.
My crew will be getting there around noon, when the festival starts and we'll designate a meet-up point for anyone who wants to frolic around the festival with us. I'll post the time and place a little closer to the fest here in the blog. Anyone who needs info, do email me at cruelhazel@gmail.com. We're a friendly group, we loves the peoples, we promise.

Anyhow, on to other business...

Martha Stewart recently talked to Vanity Magazine about her jail sentence. She claimed that her nickname in jail was M. Diddy. I know when I think of Martha Stewart, I think of black male rappers. She described lockdown as "hideous."
Apparently, prison facilities do not quite live up the standards of her Bedford mansion.
Cry me a river, M. Diddy.

A gem in the article was when Stewart talks about her ankle bracelet, saying:

"I watched them put it on. You can figure out how to get it off," she is quoted as saying. "It's on the Internet. I looked it up."

Her publicist's eyes "widened with alarm" when Stewart made the remark.

On a side note, Martha only took off the bracelet to do some custom embroidery and add a silk lining. She will be featuring her project on her next episode of her TV show, as well as showing the importance of window treatments in cell rooms and tea time with fellow inmates.

She also made mention of her new show, similar to Trump's "Apprentice.":

She says her version of "The Apprentice" will be different than Donald Trump's and that she doesn't want to be portrayed as mean and harsh. She says she would never use Trump's catchphrase, "You're fired."

"We are trying to come up with other ways to say it," she says. "For instance, if someone is from Idaho, I could say, `You're back in Boise for apple-picking time.'"

I'm not even going to comment on that.

Particularly amusing is her comment on Jon Stewart of the Daily Show. She makes reference to being aware of the jokes made at her expense with no hard feelings. In fact, she states that he is "even better looking in person than on TV" and has "such a crush on him."
All I'se gotta say is,
Step down, bitch.
I called dibs on him already.